Longing for LiveJournal

So I'm 30 years old now, and I'm not exactly sure how I feel about that. I'm swimming in a sea of nostalgia peppered with regret, but that's sort of an average Monday for me.

I've been rewatching Avatar: The Last Airbender, and I finished up the series tonight. Even at 30, there are scenes in that show that make me clap and squeal with delight like an over-excited 13-year-old. The writing really is fantastic, and it's all the more impressive when you realize they did it within the constraints of a kids' show on Nickelodeon. Sure, some of the symbolism and conflicts are about as subtle as a brick to the face (coughZukocough), but the characters were developed enough and their struggles were real enough that I was tearing up at several points, even on a second watching.

It's time like this that I miss LiveJournal. Watching a really good movie or TV series always leaves me hungry for more, so I generally turn to fanfiction. Back when I used LJ extensively, my friends list was about half comprised of very talented fan writers and artists, and I usually discovered new fandoms because of them. It was a great setup, because as soon as I finished a spectacular series, I'd already have a stockpile of fanfiction to devour. These days I'm forced to turn to Google searches, which can occasionally turn up insightful, in-character, well-plotted stories, but mostly I just find idiotic "drabbles" (does anyone actually know what a drabble is anymore?) or surprise small-penis-fetish smut.

I'd rant about people sticking their fetishes in my fandom, but coming from a semi-reformed yaoi fangirl, it'd be a little hypocritical. (I say semi-reformed because I still enjoy the boy-on-boy romance, but I'm far more picky these days about it being in character...and usually it's not.) Anyway, if something creeps me out, I can always stop reading.

But back to LiveJournal. I really miss that sense of...not quite community, but connectedness that LJ had. In the early, early days, they had a "search by interest" feature that would show you the LJ users with the most shared interests with you. I found a lot of awesome people that way, and later when they turned it off, I expanded my network by checking out friends of friends. I'm not sure how to go about finding awesome people now. Technically, I could do it in a similar way, but blog-hopping is a little harder, and lacks that initial pool of like-minded people to draw from.

I'm reluctant to go back, because I feel like the site has really gone downhill, and most of the people I used to follow have left, so I'd have to start over again anyway. But maybe I will anyway, if only to find myself some decent fanfiction.

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